I've never done that before...

Yesterday, I tossed a nearly-whole package of (sugar free) cookies in the trash...and it only hurt a little!  (After the fact, it didn't hurt at all.)

Today marks three months of low-carbing it.  I have lost 43.8 pounds.  Three months with no binges, no out of control feelings of hopelessness...no waking up each morning hating who I am and what I have become.

I am grateful beyond what my words can express.

There are days I think of burying my face in a deep dish pizza, or eating a half a loaf of garlic bread, or some other very carby food.   I remind myself that indeed I can have that if I really want it.  The choice is mine.  Then I remind myself that I don't have to have those items today, and I choose to do without them.   One day at a time.

It is simply freedom.  

Who the Son has set free is, of course, 

Free indeed!

I remember the weeks of starting a diet every morning, only to fail sometimes before I made it to work.   Tomorrow, always tomorrow...a tomorrow that seemed an eternity away.

And I would pray.   

And I would question God.   

I would doubt.   

I'd hate myself.

And I would wake up the next day and do it all over again.

When I remember those days, that vicious cycle, I sometimes get fearful that I may fall off the wagon again, end up in the downward spiral.  (Can it really be this easy?)  But I refuse to entertain those thoughts for long.   I bring them into subjection of the promises that Jesus gave me:   It was for freedom that Christ set us free; therefore keep standing firm and do not be subject again to a yoke of slavery.  Galatians 5:1


I can so vividly remember those days of feeling so helpless and out of control, and though I hated every minute of what I was doing, I continued to do it anyway (crazy and irrational as that sounds)!   I can also remember being well on my way...having a measure of limited success with counting calories, only to fall so easily.  It's because I remember those days so well that I recognize how vitally important it is to keep God in control, and not to fall into the trap of thinking it's something I am doing on my own.  I simply believe.  Sadly, even many believers don't want to believe it can be this easy.   But this is the easiest weight I've ever dropped.